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Cheers is filmed
before a live studio audience.
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- Hey, everybody.
- Hi, Sam.
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- How are you doing?
- Okay. Thank you.
4
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Surprise, surprise.
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Lookie there. What's the occasion?
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Well, just a little peace offering.
I'm trying to make up for last night.
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Well, you should feel bad about that.
8
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I mean, no guy likes to be laughed at
at that particular moment.
9
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I just couldn't help it.
10
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You had that look on your face,
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and for just a second there,
you looked like a flounder.
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Maybe it was the light.
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Apology accepted.
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But this better be a pretty damn good
gift, I'll tell you that.
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Well, I'll be darned.
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It's a sweater?
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An Icelandic snowflake
rag-wool sweater.
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I saw it in a catalog.
I just had to get it for you.
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Well, thank you.
That-- I love it. It's great.
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Put it on right now.
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Well, you know, I like to live with
a piece of clothing for a little while
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before I actually wear it, Diane.
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- Come on, Sam.
- Come on.
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I know it's unusual, but it looks
totally different when it's on.
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One person laughs at me--
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He will be exhibiting his own insecurity
and lack of taste.
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I just hate looking silly.
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Attention, everyone. Sam is
about to model his new sweater for us.
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Hey, look, Cliff ie, goose bumps.
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Boy, there was nothing in my
horoscope about that this morning.
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Does it fit all right?
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Yeah, it fits okay. Why don't you
come on in and take a look.
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No, no, you come out here
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and show everyone
what a fashion plate you are.
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And believe me,
not so much as a smirk.
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I never saw a flounder
in a sweater before.
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M.L. Carr inside to Robert Parish.
Low to McHale.
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Hey, Sam,
the TV's on the blink again.
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- Where's Carla?
- Carla? Get out here, will you?
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TV's on the fritz again.
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Work or die.
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Thanks, Carla.
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I have a way with inanimate objects.
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Maybe you'd like to take a crack
at Norm here.
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- What do you mean?
- What do you mean what do I mean?
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I mean you've been sitting here
like a lump.
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You lost your zest for life here, Norm.
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I mean, we had two overtimes already,
49
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and you're playing motorboat
in your beer.
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00:04:02,868 --> 00:04:07,164
I'm okay. Just not the same
since Vera's been out of town.
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00:04:07,330 --> 00:04:08,874
Kind of miss having her around.
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Where is she?
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She went to visit her parents.
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Yeah, she's out there
for a week in...
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Where the heck do they live?
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Somewhere--
One of those rectangular states.
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Why didn't you go with her?
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Parents aren't wild about me
since I've been out of work.
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- Oh, come on.
- No, they think I'm not trying, Sam.
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They got this crackpot idea
that if I go out looking everyday,
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and send résumés everywhere,
making phone calls all the time,
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that somehow, by magic,
a job's just gonna appear.
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- Voodoo, huh?
- Oh, really.
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00:04:46,161 --> 00:04:48,079
Hey, Sam, let me have
two vodka rocks.
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Where are those Bloody Marys
I ordered?
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I'm sorry. Boy,
I'm getting way behind here.
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Coach is supposed to be
back from Phoenix by now.
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- Phoenix?
- Yeah.
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00:04:56,046 --> 00:04:59,090
He's back there for
T-Bone Scappagione's funeral.
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He was Coach's best friend
in the whole world, you know?
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00:05:02,385 --> 00:05:05,055
They were teammates in the minors,
then they both coached for the Sox.
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I remember that guy.
How come you didn't go, Sam?
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You know, it's funny,
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Coach really loved him,
but I never cared for the guy.
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Yeah, well, let's face it,
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taste in people
isn't your strong point.
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Yes. How would we manage
without Carla's wit?
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Carla, how do you manage
without it?
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What don't you like
about this T-Bone person?
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Lots of things.
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He's... You know the kind of guy,
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he can't pass a mirror
without checking himself out.
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Pretty-boy type.
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Thinks he's God's gift to women.
You know the kind.
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All right, all right.
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There's a difference
between thinking it and knowing it.
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- Hi, everybody.
- Hey, Coach!
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- Where the hell have you been?
- I'm sorry I'm late, Sam.
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00:06:02,654 --> 00:06:05,740
But old T-Bone wanted
to be buried in the family plot,
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and I brought the body
back with me.
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How'd he die, Coach?
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Some mysterious ailment
turns your flesh to cardboard?
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No, no, Normie. No, Normie, no.
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See, the body's at the mortuary.
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00:06:16,084 --> 00:06:18,795
This is just a promotional thing we did
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when we were down
with the Birmingham Barons.
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Old T-Bone, he saved it
all these years,
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00:06:24,968 --> 00:06:28,096
so I snatched it up and brought it
back with me for Cheers.
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Some luck, huh, Sam?
100
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Words fail me, Coach.
101
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It'll be like having my old buddy
back with me here for all time.
102
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Actually, I think this will be
a lot better.
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Sam, that's a wonderful thought.
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I'm going to-- I'm gonna put this
in my office for safekeeping.
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- I'd hate to see it get stolen.
- Thanks, Sam.
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How was the funeral, Coach?
107
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Well, actually, Diane,
it was kind of gloomy.
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Well, you know, Coach, after all,
it's hardly an occasion for rejoicing.
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00:07:05,800 --> 00:07:07,928
Oh, no, no, everything was
perfectly nice.
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It was really a nice ceremony,
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but they didn't say much
about the real T-Bone, you know?
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He's been living down there in Phoenix
for, what, a couple of years now?
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Those people really didn't know him.
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They should've had the funeral
in Boston.
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This is where all his old pals are.
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You're absolutely right, Carla.
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You know, they didn't even know why
they called him "T-Bone" down there.
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Why did they call him T-Bone, Coach?
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I don't know, Diane.
I was hoping to find out.
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I just had a wonderful idea.
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Is there any way we could
get you not to tell us?
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Not a prayer.
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Why couldn't we have
a memorial right here?
124
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We could invite
some of T-Bone's buddies,
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and they could come
and toast his memory.
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Why, that's a terrific idea, Diane.
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Then everybody could
talk about the real T-Bone.
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- Right.
- I'll make a list of guys to call.
129
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Wait a minute.
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I don't think having a bunch of guys
mourning is that good for business.
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They mourn, they drink.
132
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Call me a sentimental old fool,
but I'm for it.
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Diane, what you've written here
is just beautiful,
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00:08:23,628 --> 00:08:25,630
but do you know what--?
You know what it could use?
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A little bit more about T-Bone himself.
Know what I mean?
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Okay. Tell me about him.
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Well, in his playing days,
he was a good hitter.
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"His prowess at the plate
was legendary."
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He was a fair hitter, Diane.
Fair, for the minors.
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"He was a capable batsman."
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00:08:45,400 --> 00:08:49,487
Well, yeah, all those hits he got
were a lot of scratch infield hits.
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"His best moments
were off the field."
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Now, that's the idea.
144
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For instance, he always
made the guys laugh.
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"He was loved for
his irrepressible sense of humor."
146
00:09:00,790 --> 00:09:02,625
He was always
making fun of people.
147
00:09:04,669 --> 00:09:06,921
"We admired his sardonic wit."
148
00:09:07,088 --> 00:09:10,091
Yeah, I've seen him ride guys
till they were reduced to tears.
149
00:09:11,092 --> 00:09:14,596
"He was a hateful
and terrible person."
150
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Why don't you just stick
with what I had.
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You're right, honey.
I'd better go practice.
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Cheers.
153
00:09:26,858 --> 00:09:29,944
Hello. Yeah,
I've heard a lot about you.
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Well, hold on a sec, and I'll check.
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Are you in for Vera?
156
00:09:36,868 --> 00:09:39,621
Sure. She's out of town.
What could it hurt? Come on.
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Tracked me down, huh?
158
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Hey, I miss you, hon.
159
00:09:47,128 --> 00:09:50,215
Hasn't been the same without you
around the house the past few days.
160
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How's your mom?
161
00:09:52,675 --> 00:09:54,511
You're at our house?
162
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Since when?
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00:09:56,805 --> 00:09:58,598
You never left?
164
00:10:01,226 --> 00:10:04,437
I gotta admit, I thought I heard
someone in the john this morning.
165
00:10:08,358 --> 00:10:10,276
I can't believe this man was vain.
166
00:10:10,485 --> 00:10:13,822
Does this picture do him justice?
167
00:10:13,988 --> 00:10:16,866
Only a firing squad
would do him justice.
168
00:10:18,409 --> 00:10:21,204
What is your problem with this man?
169
00:10:21,412 --> 00:10:23,873
I know something about him
that nobody else does.
170
00:10:24,374 --> 00:10:25,917
Like what?
171
00:10:26,084 --> 00:10:27,502
Just trust me, it's very sleazy.
172
00:10:27,669 --> 00:10:30,004
Oh, come on, Sam.
This sounds serious.
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00:10:30,171 --> 00:10:34,008
- You've gotta tell me what it is.
- No, I can't do it, Diane. I'm sorry.
174
00:10:34,175 --> 00:10:35,552
How would you like
another sweater?
175
00:10:35,760 --> 00:10:39,931
Once, when Coach was out of town--
This is a very long time ago.
176
00:10:41,474 --> 00:10:45,353
--T-Bone made a play
for his wife, Angela.
177
00:10:45,520 --> 00:10:48,898
No. The rakehell.
178
00:10:49,065 --> 00:10:50,900
Of course, he didn't
get anywhere with her.
179
00:10:51,067 --> 00:10:52,068
I guess she told me
180
00:10:52,235 --> 00:10:55,071
because she had to tell somebody
after keeping it a secret for so long.
181
00:10:55,238 --> 00:10:57,866
She was afraid to tell Coach
because it would've made him crazy.
182
00:10:58,074 --> 00:10:59,159
It would have too.
183
00:10:59,325 --> 00:11:01,035
- The scum.
- Oh, I know.
184
00:11:01,202 --> 00:11:03,705
Making a play
for his best friend's wife.
185
00:11:03,955 --> 00:11:06,457
Well, that's something
even you wouldn't do.
186
00:11:06,708 --> 00:11:09,460
Well, thank you for that, Diane.
187
00:11:09,711 --> 00:11:12,130
I can't take all the credit for that,
188
00:11:12,297 --> 00:11:15,258
because most of my friends' wives
are real uggos.
189
00:11:20,096 --> 00:11:23,766
Let's just pray that this secret
goes to the grave with T-Bone.
190
00:11:23,975 --> 00:11:24,976
Oh, I hope so.
191
00:11:25,226 --> 00:11:28,646
Because if Coach ever finds out,
it will put him right in the toilet.
192
00:11:28,855 --> 00:11:30,315
All right?
193
00:11:36,237 --> 00:11:39,657
Oh, Coach, where do you wanna
put this thing for the ceremony?
194
00:11:43,745 --> 00:11:47,999
In that case, where would you like
Diane to stand?
195
00:12:05,308 --> 00:12:08,436
- Coach, I know you--
- I hate him, Sam.
196
00:12:08,603 --> 00:12:11,397
Coach, come on. Now, you have to
find a way to put this behind you.
197
00:12:11,564 --> 00:12:13,399
Angela and T-Bone
are both in heaven now.
198
00:12:13,566 --> 00:12:15,401
Let's hope he's not
hitting on her up there, huh?
199
00:12:15,568 --> 00:12:17,320
Hey, hey!
200
00:12:23,534 --> 00:12:26,829
I just wish Angela
had told me about it.
201
00:12:27,038 --> 00:12:29,749
A man and a woman shouldn't
keep secrets from each other.
202
00:12:30,041 --> 00:12:31,751
No matter what it's about, Sam.
203
00:12:32,126 --> 00:12:34,837
I don't think I agree with you, Coach.
204
00:12:35,046 --> 00:12:36,547
You don't?
205
00:12:36,756 --> 00:12:39,050
No, I don't think so.
206
00:12:39,384 --> 00:12:44,347
Let's take an outlandish example.
Like us, for instance.
207
00:12:44,555 --> 00:12:47,433
In the totally fantastical,
remote, unlikely event
208
00:12:47,600 --> 00:12:51,479
that you would ever succumb
to a foolish momentary temptation,
209
00:12:51,646 --> 00:12:56,401
I think I would prefer, hypothetically,
at least, to remain oblivious.
210
00:12:56,567 --> 00:12:58,278
You got it.
211
00:13:01,656 --> 00:13:04,117
What do you mean by that?
212
00:13:04,575 --> 00:13:06,244
I was just going along
with what you just said.
213
00:13:06,536 --> 00:13:08,621
Well, you went along pretty fast.
214
00:13:09,372 --> 00:13:11,457
Well, when you're right, you're right.
215
00:13:11,624 --> 00:13:14,961
You said it as though you already
had something in mind.
216
00:13:15,211 --> 00:13:16,754
I don't.
217
00:13:17,755 --> 00:13:19,257
You better not.
218
00:13:19,465 --> 00:13:20,591
I don't. I swear.
219
00:13:21,467 --> 00:13:23,845
- Tell the truth.
- That is the truth.
220
00:13:24,595 --> 00:13:26,973
Good. Then I wouldn't wanna know.
221
00:13:30,643 --> 00:13:36,065
Now I see what you've been up to
all this time, you...
222
00:13:36,274 --> 00:13:39,485
You're trying to drive her crazy.
223
00:13:39,652 --> 00:13:42,613
So she'll kill herself.
224
00:13:43,156 --> 00:13:46,617
I love it! Now,
if I can be of any help at all...
225
00:13:46,826 --> 00:13:48,536
- I'll keep you in mind.
- Okay.
226
00:13:51,205 --> 00:13:53,958
- Hey, Ernie.
- Hey, Artie.
227
00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:56,336
- Artie, how are...?
- Ernie, how are you?
228
00:13:56,544 --> 00:13:59,297
It's so good to see you
after all these years.
229
00:13:59,464 --> 00:14:02,216
- You look great.
- I feel fine.
230
00:14:02,383 --> 00:14:04,761
Say, it could be under
happier circumstances.
231
00:14:04,927 --> 00:14:07,597
When did you hear the shocking news
about T-Bone?
232
00:14:07,847 --> 00:14:11,267
Well, I was in the john,
and I overheard Sam and Diane.
233
00:14:11,434 --> 00:14:12,685
You mean you knew about it?
234
00:14:12,852 --> 00:14:15,104
Of course. It's in all the papers.
235
00:14:15,313 --> 00:14:17,398
Oh, my God!
236
00:14:18,358 --> 00:14:21,069
- Hey, Coach--
- The afternoon edition had pictures.
237
00:14:21,319 --> 00:14:25,740
- Pictures! I'm a laughing stock!
- No, Coach, you misunderstood.
238
00:14:25,990 --> 00:14:29,702
Coach, I think it's great you're having
this little ceremony for old T-Bone.
239
00:14:29,911 --> 00:14:33,456
Well, there ain't gonna be any
little ceremony for old T-Bone, Artie.
240
00:14:33,664 --> 00:14:35,208
That dirty, filthy little pig.
241
00:14:35,375 --> 00:14:36,626
Why, Coach?
242
00:14:36,793 --> 00:14:39,379
You read it in the papers!
243
00:14:39,670 --> 00:14:43,174
No, Coach. Coach, he's talking about
T-Bone dying. Now, come on.
244
00:14:43,424 --> 00:14:45,343
- No. There's nothing to say, Sam.
- Yes, there is.
245
00:14:45,551 --> 00:14:47,303
Come into my office here,
and let's have a talk.
246
00:14:47,512 --> 00:14:49,931
Arthur, have a drink
on the house, okay?
247
00:14:50,098 --> 00:14:53,267
Carla, you wanna help him
get a drink there, please?
248
00:14:54,477 --> 00:14:56,479
What the hell do you think
you're doing?
249
00:14:56,646 --> 00:14:59,440
Well, I'm going to help you
with the Coach.
250
00:14:59,649 --> 00:15:01,442
I have known this man for 20 years.
251
00:15:01,651 --> 00:15:04,112
I think by now that I have
a pretty good idea how to help him,
252
00:15:04,278 --> 00:15:06,155
and I'm gonna, by myself.
253
00:15:06,364 --> 00:15:10,243
Okay, fine. I'll be waiting right here
outside the door when you fail.
254
00:15:10,952 --> 00:15:13,454
When and if you fail.
255
00:15:14,080 --> 00:15:15,915
More when.
256
00:15:17,875 --> 00:15:18,876
Come on, Coach.
257
00:15:19,085 --> 00:15:21,003
You're gonna have to go through
with this thing now.
258
00:15:21,254 --> 00:15:22,713
The guys are gonna be
out there any minute.
259
00:15:22,964 --> 00:15:25,883
He betrayed me, Sam. I loved him
like a brother, and he betrayed me.
260
00:15:26,467 --> 00:15:29,804
You know, once they were threatening
to send him down to a Double-A club.
261
00:15:29,971 --> 00:15:32,890
And I swear to you, Sam,
I went up to the front office and said,
262
00:15:33,099 --> 00:15:36,561
"You send T-Bone down,
you gotta send me down too."
263
00:15:36,727 --> 00:15:37,728
I did, Sam.
264
00:15:37,937 --> 00:15:40,314
As I recall, you kind of liked it
down there too, didn't you?
265
00:15:40,481 --> 00:15:43,109
We had a great time.
Why did he do it to me?
266
00:15:43,317 --> 00:15:46,487
Coach, I don't know.
Listen. Listen to me.
267
00:15:46,821 --> 00:15:50,867
It was a one-time thing, Coach.
I mean, he lost his head once.
268
00:15:51,075 --> 00:15:54,745
I think you're gonna have to
accept it and forgive him.
269
00:15:54,912 --> 00:15:57,748
But why did he do it? Why?
270
00:15:58,583 --> 00:16:00,418
I don't know. I can't answer that.
271
00:16:00,585 --> 00:16:03,421
I just hate watching it
eat you up like this.
272
00:16:03,588 --> 00:16:05,590
I wish I could cheer you up or some--
Oh, wait, wait.
273
00:16:05,798 --> 00:16:07,884
Oh, good, good.
You haven't seen this.
274
00:16:08,050 --> 00:16:09,844
This is great.
275
00:16:10,094 --> 00:16:11,429
Look at this. Come on.
276
00:16:11,637 --> 00:16:14,015
Don't I look like a dink, huh?
277
00:16:15,141 --> 00:16:16,434
Look at this. Look at this thing.
278
00:16:16,601 --> 00:16:20,897
Ordinarily, Sam, that would have me
on the floor, but not today.
279
00:16:22,607 --> 00:16:24,317
Come on, man,
pull yourself out of this.
280
00:16:24,567 --> 00:16:26,694
This is ancient history.
It's in the past.
281
00:16:26,944 --> 00:16:30,573
Yeah, for him, it's the past.
For me, it's just happening.
282
00:16:34,785 --> 00:16:37,163
I can help you, Coach.
283
00:16:38,623 --> 00:16:41,334
Let your subconscious speak to me.
284
00:16:41,626 --> 00:16:43,461
You have to work through
your feelings about T-Bone.
285
00:16:43,628 --> 00:16:47,673
You have a lot of bottled-up feelings
that need to be released.
286
00:16:47,840 --> 00:16:50,968
Yeah, if I had T-Bone here right now,
I'd release all his teeth.
287
00:16:51,135 --> 00:16:52,678
- That's good, that's good.
- That's good.
288
00:16:52,845 --> 00:16:54,055
See, you need to talk to T-Bone.
289
00:16:54,222 --> 00:16:58,059
Tell him how hurt and angry you are
so you can work through your feelings.
290
00:16:58,226 --> 00:17:00,353
Come on, Diane. T-Bone's dead.
291
00:17:01,521 --> 00:17:05,650
No. No, he isn't.
Here's T-Bone right here.
292
00:17:06,359 --> 00:17:07,485
Spill your guts to him.
293
00:17:07,652 --> 00:17:11,697
- I don't think that's such a good idea.
- It'll help him.
294
00:17:11,906 --> 00:17:14,242
I hate looking silly.
295
00:17:15,159 --> 00:17:16,702
I doubt that you want that.
296
00:17:19,664 --> 00:17:22,041
Hey, Ernie, how you doing?
297
00:17:22,208 --> 00:17:27,505
It has to be deeper, Sam, like,
"Hey, Ernie, how you doing?"
298
00:17:27,880 --> 00:17:30,132
Oh, right. Every time he talked,
he'd do that. He'd wipe his nose.
299
00:17:30,299 --> 00:17:31,509
All right. All right.
300
00:17:31,717 --> 00:17:33,219
Hey, Ernie, how you doing?
301
00:17:33,386 --> 00:17:36,806
It's, "Hey, Ernie, how you doing?"
And then he wiped it that way.
302
00:17:36,973 --> 00:17:38,224
All right, all right. Okay.
303
00:17:38,391 --> 00:17:40,768
- After.
- All right, all right.
304
00:17:41,394 --> 00:17:44,480
Hey, Ernie, how you doing?
305
00:17:44,647 --> 00:17:46,566
- Sam, the sniff has to be louder.
- The sniff is fine.
306
00:17:46,732 --> 00:17:49,860
Will you two please stop!
Hey! Hey! Hey!
307
00:17:50,069 --> 00:17:51,571
The sniff--
308
00:17:53,239 --> 00:17:54,699
That is irrelevant.
309
00:17:54,865 --> 00:17:56,742
Now, something is eating away
at the Coach's guts.
310
00:17:56,951 --> 00:17:58,661
We have to address that.
311
00:18:01,497 --> 00:18:04,834
Ernie, your wife
was a wonderful woman.
312
00:18:05,042 --> 00:18:08,963
I mean, she was really beautiful.
I lost my head.
313
00:18:09,171 --> 00:18:12,592
Now, can you blame me for going
crazy about something that you had
314
00:18:12,758 --> 00:18:15,803
that I could never have myself?
315
00:18:16,470 --> 00:18:18,723
She was the best.
316
00:18:19,890 --> 00:18:22,310
Nobody could resist her.
317
00:18:24,478 --> 00:18:27,523
Come on. Go out and make
that speech for me, huh?
318
00:18:28,566 --> 00:18:29,900
Come on, Ernie.
319
00:18:30,109 --> 00:18:32,778
All the people out there
think that I'm a real nice guy
320
00:18:33,029 --> 00:18:34,572
and a good friend.
321
00:18:34,780 --> 00:18:36,782
Leave me that, huh?
322
00:18:37,950 --> 00:18:41,621
T-Bone, what you did
I can never forgive you for.
323
00:18:42,163 --> 00:18:43,664
Never forgive you!
324
00:18:43,914 --> 00:18:47,418
And you're dead now, and there's
only one way I can get even with you.
325
00:18:47,585 --> 00:18:49,962
It's to go out there
and really do you in.
326
00:18:50,129 --> 00:18:51,297
And I'm gonna do it.
327
00:18:51,505 --> 00:18:52,548
- Coach, come on.
- Come on.
328
00:18:52,757 --> 00:18:54,967
And just stay away from me!
329
00:18:59,388 --> 00:19:00,931
Okay, everybody, come on.
330
00:19:01,223 --> 00:19:03,684
And thanks for coming, but sit down,
and let's get this over with.
331
00:19:03,893 --> 00:19:06,354
Come on. The memorial service
is about to begin.
332
00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:09,482
Okay. Last call before the memorial.
333
00:19:10,441 --> 00:19:13,944
Come on, now. Don't do this.
It won't make you feel any better.
334
00:19:14,153 --> 00:19:17,448
I'm feeling much better
just thinking about it.
335
00:19:21,494 --> 00:19:23,954
Now, okay, everybody set?
336
00:19:24,413 --> 00:19:29,293
All right. I had a beautiful speech
written for me here,
337
00:19:29,460 --> 00:19:32,963
but I'd just rather say a few things
from my own heart
338
00:19:33,172 --> 00:19:34,882
about T-Bone Scappagione.
339
00:19:35,091 --> 00:19:36,676
Coach, don't--
340
00:19:36,884 --> 00:19:39,845
Just let me get it over with,
will you, Sam?
341
00:19:41,681 --> 00:19:44,350
T-Bone Scappagione
was a son of a--
342
00:19:48,062 --> 00:19:50,398
That man was a son of a--
343
00:20:00,282 --> 00:20:03,786
T-Bone Scappagione
was the son of an immigrant.
344
00:20:07,248 --> 00:20:11,001
And like most immigrants,
he was a human being.
345
00:20:20,636 --> 00:20:23,556
Human beings make mistakes.
346
00:20:23,973 --> 00:20:26,559
We're just not perfect.
347
00:20:27,268 --> 00:20:30,187
But I'll tell you what isn't a mistake,
348
00:20:30,730 --> 00:20:33,524
to love someone and to forgive him.
349
00:20:34,567 --> 00:20:36,986
No matter what his shortcomings.
350
00:20:38,487 --> 00:20:40,656
That's not a mistake.
351
00:20:43,576 --> 00:20:45,119
I loved that man.
352
00:20:46,787 --> 00:20:47,955
And I forgive him.
353
00:20:50,624 --> 00:20:56,630
And I know that for the rest of my life,
every day there's gonna be a moment...
354
00:20:57,339 --> 00:20:59,216
...when I'm gonna miss him.
355
00:21:02,303 --> 00:21:04,597
That's all I got to say.
356
00:21:11,103 --> 00:21:13,272
That was beautiful, Ernie.
357
00:21:13,439 --> 00:21:14,440
Thanks, Artie.
358
00:21:14,607 --> 00:21:16,066
No, I mean it.
359
00:21:16,275 --> 00:21:17,568
That stuff that you said
360
00:21:17,735 --> 00:21:21,405
could almost make me forgive
T-Bone for what he did to me.
361
00:21:21,822 --> 00:21:24,283
- For what he did to you?
- Yeah.
362
00:21:24,700 --> 00:21:26,327
What--? What did he do?
363
00:21:27,953 --> 00:21:30,706
He went after my wife.
364
00:21:31,624 --> 00:21:33,042
Yours too?
365
00:21:33,209 --> 00:21:35,044
Hey, you guys got off easy.
366
00:21:35,211 --> 00:21:36,670
What did he do to you?
367
00:21:36,837 --> 00:21:38,672
He borrowed $500 from me.
368
00:21:38,881 --> 00:21:41,300
And never even tried
to pay me back.
369
00:21:41,467 --> 00:21:44,136
Well, how is that worse
than going after our wives?
370
00:21:44,345 --> 00:21:46,764
Hey, I've seen your wives.
371
00:21:51,143 --> 00:21:52,561
Why beat around the bush?
372
00:21:52,770 --> 00:21:55,439
Let's admit it.
The guy was a fun go.
373
00:21:55,606 --> 00:21:57,483
- Yeah!
- Right, a fun go!
374
00:21:57,775 --> 00:21:59,693
I gotta admit, I still love the guy.
375
00:21:59,902 --> 00:22:02,530
After all, he never
made a pass at my wife.
376
00:22:02,696 --> 00:22:04,448
Are you nuts?
377
00:22:04,615 --> 00:22:07,451
The man was at your house so often
he got his mail there.
378
00:22:07,618 --> 00:22:10,204
Don't talk to me like that.
My wife would never cheat on me.
379
00:22:10,454 --> 00:22:14,708
Hey, hey. He was the worst guy
I ever knew.
380
00:22:14,875 --> 00:22:17,169
We shouldn't be honoring him,
381
00:22:17,378 --> 00:22:19,922
we should be dancing on his grave.
382
00:22:20,172 --> 00:22:21,465
Yeah!
383
00:22:21,632 --> 00:22:24,134
Hey, come on, you guys. Come on.
What are you doing?
384
00:22:24,343 --> 00:22:29,723
Listen, you gotta just try and forget
about how he was in life
385
00:22:29,932 --> 00:22:33,477
and remember him as he--
As he is now,
386
00:22:33,644 --> 00:22:34,979
dead.
387
00:22:37,481 --> 00:22:39,942
I say we take that cardboard cutout
388
00:22:40,150 --> 00:22:43,195
and do to it what we should have done
to T-Bone while he was alive.
389
00:22:43,404 --> 00:22:44,738
Right!
390
00:22:44,989 --> 00:22:46,407
Let's hang him in effigy.
391
00:22:46,657 --> 00:22:47,700
- Right!
- Yeah!
392
00:22:47,867 --> 00:22:50,536
The hell with that!
Let's hang him right here in Boston.
393
00:22:50,703 --> 00:22:52,705
Right!
394
00:22:54,164 --> 00:22:55,958
Will you do something?
395
00:23:01,672 --> 00:23:08,929
Amazing grace
How sweet the sound
396
00:23:09,680 --> 00:23:17,688
That saved a wretch like me
397
00:23:18,397 --> 00:23:23,027
I once was lost
398
00:23:23,193 --> 00:23:27,239
But now I'm found
399
00:23:28,073 --> 00:23:35,539
Was blind, but now I see
400
00:23:37,708 --> 00:23:47,259
Amazing grace
How sweet the sound
401
00:23:47,509 --> 00:23:55,851
That saved a wretch like me
402
00:23:56,101 --> 00:24:00,940
I once was lost
403
00:24:01,106 --> 00:24:06,236
But now I'm found
404
00:24:06,487 --> 00:24:15,079
Was blind, but now I see